FANPTL

Find
A
New
Place
To
Live

Essentials:

• Under 6 Hours from Home
• Safe cycling and running
• Good grocery store(s)
• Reliable, fast internet connection
• Bedroom with opening windows

Really Wants:

• Costco
• Trader Joe's/WholeFoods/FreshMarket/EarthFare
• Velodrome access
• Open Water Swimming
• Seasonal changes
• Familiar faces
• Under 3 hours to a beach
• Ability to use my bike trainer in my home
• Not GA/SC
• Active/intelligent young (my age) people to play with

Bonus Points:

• Bath tub (for those ice baths)
• Outlet Shopping
• Garage

Work in progress...

After yesterday's post about Douchemaster Ryan and his idiotic stance about abortions, I've been thinking a lot about that subject.

Hillary Clinton proposed a goal regarding abortions here in the US: Safe, legal and never.

We can get there with (as I said yesterday) comprehensive and universal sex education and availability of birth control. It's not that complicated until the bible thumpers get involved. The science shows clearly that with the knowledge of how weiners and va-jay-jays work, people will get less pregnant. If that means that you abstain, great. If it means that you jimmy up and get on the pill, awesome. Maybe it's some other (reliable combination of) form(s) - this excludes "praying you won't get pregnant" and "withdrawal". But in any case, knowledge is power, even when it comes to the ol' in-and-out.

Now. What if we realized that this goal (safe, legal, and never) is EXACTLY the same as our goal for some major surgeries like... oh, I don't know... a Quadruple Bypass. Or maybe a tracheotomy as a result of a lifetime of smoking.

With the proper health care/diet/physical activity regimen throughout one's life (and not polluting yourself and the rest of us with cigarettes), one can reasonably expect that the probability of either of these procedures is pretty low. Maybe not zero. After all, some of us are just unlucky enough to have genetic predispositions to heart issues, and maybe there's some other reason that you'd need a permanent orifice installed in your throat (and having a cool -I-am-a-robot- voice box is not really one). But pretty low, if you follow the guidelines you learned from your parents, teachers and doctors about not eating three whoppers every day, taking the stairs, and watching your physical condition.

So the probability of an unexpected pregnancy can be made pretty low using the same idea. You know how babies are made and more importantly, how they're /not/ made. And if you follow those rules, you'll be pretty close to never needing an abortion (or to pay for one because you knocked up the prom queen). Sure, there are going to be accidents. And part of the birth control equation will always be the morning-after pill. But yep, some of the swimmers will be sneaky enough to get through. And that's when the Safe, Legal part comes in.

We can make "Never" a goal, just like zero accident days at the factory is the goal. But we've got to give our young people the education and ammunition to make it possible. Just like telling them how to stay healthy.

Paul Ryan, coward

You try to contact a representative who happens not to be your own via the email link on his page to make a constructive suggestion about something he said. The coward requires you to enter your zip code and if it doesn't fall in his district, you can't email him. Hmm... maybe he can't handle the volume of arguments from outside his district? Pussy.

Paul Ryan, I'm looking at you.

Quoth the coward: "We don't want a country where abortion is simply outlawed. We want a country where it isn't even considered"

You don't want abortions, asshole? Then fund comprehensive sex education and make birth control available and non-stigmatized for everybody. And make damn sure that all those barren bible-thumpers that want children go first to the adoption agencies for all the non-aborted American babies instead of running off to the IVF clinic. Pumping your body full of synthetic hormones when it's clear that you're not going to have kids in the natural course of things can only be described as defying God's will just as blatantly as getting an abortion.

If it wasn't already obvious, you're a jerk.

Back on two wheels.

Finally, after a long off-season of trainer rides and (I'm sure) angry neighbors on the weekends, I've found my way back to the road for the last two weeks, and boy is it great. I met up with some friends and rode the course - glad to have some company for my first outdoor ride of the season, just in case something happened along the way. This past weekend was two days of beautiful weather, blue skies and just the perfect way to start the mornings.

After  making sure everything was working more or less properly and the requisite "clean-the-house-before-the-cleaning-lady-comes" bike wash, I took my shiny Italian steed to the boys at Chain Reaction for a new chain, tuneup and once-over. While there, I got into a conversation with Brad about the season and racing and he mentioned that he hadn't been to the track yet for the certification class... And would I like to come?

Took me about half a day to decide, but YES! I'm going to Rock Hill Velodrome the last weekend of April for my first experience riding the banks with no brakes. Can't wait.

2012 Accomplishments

• 01/01/12 - Grovetown 200k: 7:11:23, 17.3mph, 125.01mi
• 01/14/12 - Augusta-Charleston Ride: 7:27:06, 18.4mph, 137.93mi
• 05/06/12 - Aiken to Ride Metric Century
• 06/23/12 - Garrett County Gran Fondo: 102.02mi, 10,584 ft gain, 45/596 in the KOM.
• 08/2012 - Some time in the Alps. Madeleine, Colmbiere, Joux Plane, Roseland, Alpe d'Huez...
• 11/13/12 - Home Ownership, vol. I: 3 years, 1 day

Rum.

Dark, straight, no chaser. Great big glasses of it.

Don't be a chooch. Drink yer hooch.

...And exhale

It's been a long time for a new entry here, and there's a reason. Somehow - though I'm not a very superstitious person in general - I was very hesitant to speak about the sale of the house until it was all done. I didn't even tell certain [very close] family until after the closing had occurred just in case karma wanted to play a nasty game with me.

But since November 13th, I've slowly watched paperwork come through, final bills clear, refunds process, and deeds change hands. And as of that date, I'm no longer part of the not-quite-the-All-American-dream-anymore millions who own a home. I'm back to renting my residence, and boy is it great. I haven't had such great weekends and nights of restful sleep in three years and it's only getting better as the wake-up-worrying-about-the-house night crazies go away. Now the only thing that wakes me up in the night are the drunks outside banging into the trash cans and the noisy compressor on my fridge.

 Do I miss the house? Certain parts of it - the fact that deliveries were always left in the carport so I didn't have to go get them, the fact that the fridge was a side-by-side, a little more cabinet space in the kitchen. But other than that, nope. I love my new place. And I love the freedom I have. Plus, whereas before my neighbors were pleasant enough, now my neighbor is the BEST beer store in town. Oh dear lord, it makes you wanna cry.

Just to be clear, I didn't skimp on the lawn care for the fall - the last Sunday before closing, I spent all day raking and bagging the pine straw I had allowed to accumulate. I filled 22 lawn-size bags with the stuff. I put it out at the street and without fail, it was collected by some stranger before the day was even over. And the place looked great for the new owners - they even thanked my for leaving in such good shape!

So now what do I do on the weekends? Well, let's see - last Sunday I rode my bike, went for a row, ate a stupidly unhealthy brekkie, did a little Christmas shopping, swam at the lake with the tri-kids, and saw a movie. A pretty great day. And tomorrow and the next day are looking pretty similar. Maybe a nap. Maybe a stroll around downtown. But no raking. And no worrying about the pool.